The Unsaid Words

When I have an intense conversation with a nurse this morning, I've found myself so irritated. She said that some people in the clinic didn't like my actions in the clinic. At first It's nothing to me, but when she said something about my work, It was irritated me more. I realized that my work is not always a perfect but, I need to know which is my work that not satisfied and the one who felt that way, so I can fix my methods. Unfortunately, she made a wrong turn when she didn't tell me who is the one that unsatisfied with my works and in what case. She didn't hit the break, yet she accelerate more by saying that I couldn't receive a critics, well she had crashed then, and the conversation was over. I walk to my motorcycle and went to another clinic.

Actually I feel ashamed right now because I'm so irritated that time. There was unspoken words that never be spoken that time : "It's not a criticism but more like a reproach to me". I just can't said that and just gone ...

The Entangled Memories

Have you ever fall in love ? -Yes- Most of us have fallen in love at least once. Have you ever recall a memories of your past romance stories ? Most of us would said yes, we have ... Today, I have a journey to a Purwodadi, a small town located in eastern central java. I have an errand from my office. When our car stopped to have a lunch this afternoon, We stopped in a small restaurant. Somehow, it felt so nostalgic, then I asked one of the maid there, she said that this restaurant used to be smaller than nowadays. Finally I recognized this restaurant as a memorable restaurant.

Well, almost 3 years has been passed since that day. It was rainy and the restaurant was so small and very crowded. I was a medical student in a forensic internship that days. It was a good days. When we finished some business in Purwodadi back then we have a lunch together that time, in that small restaurant, with that large group of medical student from 3 universities. Love can bloom anytime they said, everywhere, and every moment, event in the direst moment. I fell for her that time, but well, she's gone now, without a proper words.

Well, I guess this visit is a farewell for you, dear ... May you find what you've searched for all this time out there ...

Pain is Power !

When delusion taste better than real world ... -Yes-, We sometimes experienced this kind of feeling. Most of us usually searching a "reset" button to end this nightmare. But, this guys were different, they dwelled themselves into delusion more than they usually did. Hikonin Sentai Akibaranger told us about these kind guy. This unofficial sentai was released in April 9th and rated mature rather than kid because it can broke kids image about sentai.

All member of this group were otaku, a nerd if you want to know what otaku is. They have their own dream, unreached maybe, and they cover each other ass, but it's not clear what is the purpose of the gear founder Ms. Hakase ... :) Well, I think I'm going to see where this interesting story roll out.

Pain is Power !

World's Ugly Face

Have ever seen a whore ? Not many people have ever see one. But have you ever seen a mother ? Many of us have ever seen one. When I get a night shift a couple days ago, I have a very late patient. She is very beautiful in her brown mini skirt and she wears a heavy make up. For a moment, I was stunned, but I got my nerves back and the therapeutic contract was established. From her physical examination I learned that she already a mother, and she got an upper respiratory tract infection.

She told me that she had a little girl back home with her unemployed father. I've finished the contract by giving her prescribing and she gone. In the morning, about 6 A.M, She returned while carrying her unconscious little girl about 5 years old. I checked her fast and learned that she got a febrile convulsion 15 minutes ago, I checked her and I need to hospitalized her.

When I proposed her mother to do it, She said "Sorry doctor, I can only take her to you, not any one else, because I got no costumer last night you know." I feel sad for her and I give her some antibiotic, some anti-convulsion drug and fever-lowering drug for her child and told her to bring her to the hospital when she got worse.

Honestly, I don't know the continuation of  the little girl's story, but I guess she got some pneumonia back then. I hope she would be okay ...

The Rabbit

This morning, I saw a cute brown rabbit in front of my house. He twinkle his ears and rub it, very cute as if he told me to catch him. When I approach him, he run and stop, looking at me as if he said "Can we play again ?" I tried to catch him several time. but he always running away and always keep a distance and watch me as if he mocked me "Is that all you got ?!" I told myself not trying to catch him again, but I tried again and he finally go into an empty backyard, gone !

This event triggered old memory of my experience with girls all this time. When I chased a girl I was being fooled like with him. Most of them said nothing when they gone away. I learned a bitter lesson one by one and finally learned that love was not a sole reason to married someone. In javanese philosophy, there are Bibit, Bebet and Bobot. Bibit means seed, whose descendant our spouse was. Bebet means our spouse has a good nature and can be socialized well. Bobot means our spouse has an ability to make money and able to guarantee the welfare of his/ her family, in the other word for a wife, it means being able to manage the family funding.

  

Flattered

When I wake up this morning, I saw a cat passed by. I remembered an advice from an old friend of mine. "Try to praise the cat" he said, "Most of them will eventually stopped by and looked at you" he continue his words. I call the cat "Hello pretty !" and magically she turn his face around and I can give her a good rub on her back and head. She eventually sit and enjoy my rub !

This is a good lesson, we knew a fact that most creature love to be flattered. We are just the same with them, but we showed it in a different way and sometime we knew that we are being flattered. Most of our reaction is blushing, and for some people that dislike it, they still said that they were flattered.

So, have you flattered someone today ?

Nobility of a Job

When we saw some people do certain job, a dirty one, we often pout what they do for their life. When we look closer, we are not much different from them who do an inappropriate job, just make some money for life. I didn't agree with robbery, thievery, debauchery, or some kind like that, what I was trying to say that sometime in our job, we do it just the same way as they did.

As an example, as a general practitioner in Indonesia, we are demanded to provide an excellent medical service with a minimum price. We, doctors, are not shaman, we need to perform a good physical examination, few laboratory examinations and you must buy your own drugs in our prescriptions. Most important of all we need make money to fund our live, buy our needs. More problems occur when incompetent person give some medication to a sick people (including a common people who buy a prescription drug on their own).

All problems we have, shown us how chaotic is the healthcare regulation in our country. Most healthcare regulation are for doctors and pharmacists. The regulation itself rather than giving a protection, just more pressure to them. In the addition, the unclear of law processing regulation make some side extort money from its victims. So, what can we do as a doctor ? Read more, Do more practice and hone your skills. So we can survive in this chaotic world and make a honest money for our living.